Everything Stinks

"OPPOsaurus WRX" (opposaurus)
07/20/2017 at 11:02 • Filed to: None

My office consists of myself and my boss. We have too much work for the two of us so he hired a guy to come in on a project by project basis as a ‘consultant’. The guy stinks. Like I can smell him. I dont think he has showered in a couple days.

This past weekend we took the kids to the beach to ride the carousel. We are about 25 minutes into a 30 minute trip the the baby, who was asleep suddenly starts crying but stops shortly after. Then the smell comes. Yep he pooped. Well he is asleep we’ll deal with it when we park. No he wasn’t asleep, he had just found something new to play with. Shit was everywhere, head to toe.

DISCUSSION (15)

E90M3 > OPPOsaurus WRX
07/20/2017 at 11:12

When I was in the oil field we had an operator who didn’t shower. I called him “la muerte” because he smelled like death.

Now at the chemical plant we’ve got an engineer who is know as “the skunk” because she smells terrible. I don’t think she showers regularly and definitely doesn’t use deodorant.

I don’t know what it is about full grown people not having acceptable hygiene habits.

Milky > OPPOsaurus WRX
07/20/2017 at 11:18

Lol at the high lift jack bolted to the hood. It wants to be a Wrangler.

Robert Belvin > E90M3
07/20/2017 at 11:23

I dated a girl from Georgia (the country) for a night, and she didn’t wear deodorant. It’s gross when someone from a deodorant-wearing culture doesn’t wear it, but it’s kinda hot when they’re from a non-deodorant country and it’s normal

haveacarortwoorthree2 > OPPOsaurus WRX
07/20/2017 at 11:33

Showers cost extra. Offer the man $20 in cash every day he shows up for work all nice and clean!

Master Cylinder > OPPOsaurus WRX
07/20/2017 at 12:18

I feel your pain. I’ve been stuck in a stupid training seminar for two weeks - imagine an auditorium full of people, like in undergrad, except they’re all supposed to be professionals. The person I’ve had to sit next to the whole time has garbage breath and is constantly farting. Along with the smell comes morbid obesity, meaning I have had to surrender a quarter of my already limited seat space or suffer the psychological horror of letting someone else’s arm fat wrap partially around my own arm.

When I get out of here and back to my office I’m going to shut the door and not let anyone in for a month.

TheRealBicycleBuck > OPPOsaurus WRX
07/20/2017 at 12:23

My wife was the victim of baby poop. Our son had filled his pull-up, but my wife didn’t hear the action and the smell was contained, so she thought it was just a wet. She yanked them down while he was still standing and smeared fresh poop all over his legs. Undaunted, she picked him up by the armpits and held him at arms length all the way to the bathroom. Things when bad when she leaned over to set him on the toilet. The pressure in her lower back pushed a disk out of place. She went to the floor.

On her hands and knees, she started crawling her way to the living room phone. Our son thought she was trying to play horsey. He got off the toilet and tried to climb on board for the ride. My poor wife had to fend off a kid covered in poop who was trying to climb on her back. Somehow, all the action pushed the disk back into place and she was able to stand again.

Somehow she managed to clean up the mess before I got home. I guess her nose was protesting more than her lower back.

OPPOsaurus WRX > Master Cylinder
07/20/2017 at 12:33

yea thats a bit messed up. people need to take care of themselves

OPPOsaurus WRX > Master Cylinder
07/20/2017 at 12:33

yea thats a bit messed up. people need to take care of themselves

OPPOsaurus WRX > TheRealBicycleBuck
07/20/2017 at 12:34

ha thats fucked up. kids are nasty

E90M3 > Robert Belvin
07/20/2017 at 12:56

Said people were from a deodorant wearing country.

Robert Belvin > E90M3
07/20/2017 at 13:02

Oh. Hmm....

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > OPPOsaurus WRX
07/20/2017 at 13:06

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qkyvE5t6JYc

RiceRocketeer Extraordinaire > OPPOsaurus WRX
07/20/2017 at 13:16

I was at a conference where the guy across from me had death breath. I quit the job the next year rather than go to the conference again. (Yes, I know I probably wouldn’t get seated across from the same guy again, but these things cut deep.)

Funktheduck > OPPOsaurus WRX
07/20/2017 at 15:50

My mom used to be an office manager for a repo company. There was a repo guy who never cleaned himself or his clothes. It was so bad his smell started transferring to the truck and the other drivers wouldn’t go in it. Since she was in charge she had to be the one to tell him to go home and get cleaned up and not come back till he does. To continue having a job she made it a requirement he regularly bathe and wash his clothes.

OPPOsaurus WRX > Funktheduck
07/20/2017 at 16:07

thats gross. you would think this is all common sense.